The Shopworn Perennials of the MBZ Trolls

It seems like every Manboobz argument, if it goes long enough, will have the MRAs whipping out one of a startlingly small number of arguments. We've talked about these again and again, but it's like knocking over mushrooms; another one, nearly the same, grows right up again.

I like making goofy list posts, so here's some of the more common ones I've seen:


The Parody Social Justice Movement:
"This needs a trigger warning for the misandric use of oppressive language by privilege-denying White Girl Feminists!"

The A Woman Did A Bad Thing Once:
"According to this news story, a woman committed a crime against a man! So much for your 'feminism' if women are capable of evil, huh? Plus, this means that you're not allowed to talk about violence by men against women now."

The Statistics Tug Of War:
"Those numbers from a peer-reviewed study conducted by an established and highly credible federal agency are feminist lies! Allow me to present my own statistics from a me-reviewed study conducted in my butt."

The Gish Gallop:
"Oh yeah, well, what about Title IX? And VAWA? And false accusations? And the Pussy Pass? And the wage gap myth? And affirmative action? And WIC? And this Andrea Dworkin quote? And that rash I've had on my right buttcheek lately?"

The Halp, Halp, I'm Metaphorically Oppressed:
"Men in this society are basically like slaves with a war against them. ...Slaves who can choose their job and earn money, and a war without actual fighting, but they're like slaves and it's like a war, seriously."

The I'm Not Good At Veiling My Threats:
"If women continue to treat men in this manner, I cannot be held responsible if they experience... repercussions. Women will be... held accountable. It is not my idea, but inevitable that there will be... rebellion. *strokes white cat*"

The My Penis Is Really Really Important:
"Women are controlling me and ruining my life because they won't all sleep with me! I'm not interested in this 'feminism' business until it can guarantee me that women will not be allowed to cruelly deny me sex. So I judge all of your ideas by one simple standard--what's in it for my dick?"

The Denial Olympics Gold Medal Winner:
"The MRA is a reasonable and peaceable movement for gender equality, and MGTOW is a philosophical method for individualists to seek serenity. I don't know how anyone ever got a different impression."

The Fighting The Power:
"Sure, MRAs sometimes say hateful and violent and frankly terrifying things, but that's just because they've been so oppressed for so long. Can you blame them for expressing their rage against a system that has hurt them so often and so badly?"

The Real Housewives Enthusiast:
"I don't know why women are complaining, when they all can just get a rich man to pay for their existence any time they want. It's not like a woman has to hold down a job. Women definitely never had jobs in any of history!"

The Did Not Read The Mission Statement:
"All you people do all day is complain about misogyny!"

The Ion
"You people have no lives! I will now devote hours of my life to telling you this in great detail."

The Catch-22
"This statement by a feminist that zie cares about men is a feminist co-option and appropriation of the serious concerns of the men's rights movement. Every MRA should oppose the feminist manginas' attempts to turn our glorious movement to their evil ends.

"...why don't you feminists ever talk about men's issues?"

The Argument from Alpha Fucks
"The only men who can get laid are eight-foot-tall douchebag underwear models with million dollars, a Harvard degree and a face like Brad Pitt."

ozymandias wrote:The Catch-22
"This statement by a feminist that zie cares about men is a feminist co-option and appropriation of the serious concerns of the men's rights movement. Every MRA should oppose the feminist manginas' attempts to turn our glorious movement to their evil ends.

"...why don't you feminists ever talk about men's issues?"

Ooh, yeah, this. It's a specific application of the general argument:

The Human Polygraph:
"When feminists disagree with us, they're wrong. When feminists agree with us, they're lying."

Also:

The Growling Pitbull:
"I'm going to pepper my speech with swearing, insults, bitter sarcasm, all-caps, threats of violence, offers to 'meet up in person and have a little discussion' and/or furious keyboard mashing, because making a big display out of how I am VERY ANGRY and VERY DANGEROUS is the only way to respond to your baseless allegation that MRAs have abusive personalities."

Some of these points are kind of mentioned above but

the misogyny denier

What? Oh no I am not a misoginist, I am just stating it like it is that men are superior to women....just because I think that doesn't mean I am a misogynist...in fact....I love women!!!! it is realoly YOU that hate women and femininity with all your careers and education!

the self centered douchcanoe
Both Feminists and MRAs are extreme....me I really only care about myself and so should everyone because it is a dog eat dog world.....also women are a bunch of cry babies for wanting commitment and honesty

oh yeah! I have seen this on other feminism blogs too
The but my girlfriend even agrees with me!

Hides behind women's skirts by either pretending to be the girlfriend or saying cra like my really sexy girlfriend is right here and wants you to know your all meanies!!!!!!

The Endzone Dancer

"XYZ Law has been changed to make things harder on women in ZYX country. HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES NOW WOMEN!?"

The Allen Iverson

Just substitute "activism" for practice.

the but I'm a victim:
all women lie about rape, they feel ashamed for having sex and so they must vindicate their feelings by having men arrested for rape when really they are just a dirty whore, and the real crime is women filing false reports and totally ruining mens lives forever.

The Evopsycher:
You Feminist PC Police are just mad that women are SUPPOSED to do the cleaning, cooking, and child care for free. That's BIOLOGY! So is polygamy. And Hypergamy. And anything else I feel like mentioning/whining about.

The wannabe scientist:
Farrell's research clearly proves beyond all doubt that feminist theory is bunk, just like creationism. The fact that the research doesn't dovetail with existing findings, the fact that it's nearly impossible to find a peer-reviewed study that supports his findings, and the theory is laughed at by most prominent sociologists is proof that feminism has an ideological stranglehold on the field and that feminists are just crushing dissent. But they all know the truth.

The Conspiracy Theorist:
The Gynocracy rules the world. Men are just pawns; you thought all those senators were in charge? Hah, those traitors all report to the feminazi overlords. Those weak, stupid bitches will get what's coming to them when we rise against them.

Seriously can't believe I got to make these.

The Tennis Player

"Women are at risk for rape? Men are at greater risk of being falsely accused and that's 10000 times worse!"

"Menstruation is shameful and stigmatized? Did you know men can get ARRESTED for erections?"

"Sure women have unrealistic bodies in comics, but Tony Stark and Bruce Wayne are IMPOSSIBLY RICH and impossible for me to live up to!"

"Women can work out, men can't do anything to be taller!"

etc etc (these are all real things I've seen too -_- )

The argument from Chick Talk Means Nothing:

You can SAY that, but you women don't really KNOW what you want. It's just evolutionarilisticaly scientificish biology that you chase Alphas and Pre-Selected Players, then deny it to yourselves! Listening to you would teach us NOTHING.

A Troll named Shame

"Creepy is shaming language!" "Homophobe is shaming language!" "Misogynist is shaming language!" "Asshole is shaming language!" "Rape apologist is shaming language!" "Illogical is shaming language!" "Jerk is shaming language!" "Angry is shaming language!"

Rutee wrote:The Evopsycher:
You Feminist PC Police are just mad that women are SUPPOSED to do the cleaning, cooking, and child care for free. That's BIOLOGY! So is polygamy. And Hypergamy. And anything else I feel like mentioning/whining about.

And his evil(er) twin, The Hypocritical Evopsycher:
Men are HARDWIRED BY BIOLOGY to only want skinny blond 16-year-olds with big breasts! You can't blame us! Women are HARDWIRED BY BIOLOGY to only want millionaire underwear model Brad Pitt look-alikes with Harvard Degrees! YOU SHALLOW BITCHES!!!

Miss Manners

Of course I'm going to come in here and insult you! Now why won't you be civil?

Black women, what black women

tries to blame slavery on women, forgetting that half of slaves were women, not to mention that women could not legally own property during the time, but yeah, all slaves ever were dudes in their minds and all slaveowners were bonbon eating women

hellkell wrote:Miss Manners

Of course I'm going to come in here and insult you! Now why won't you be civil?

*cough* Casey *cough*

The Definer

Basically this guy

"Feminism is any person or law we want to define as being beneficial to women and harmful to men. MRAs are specifically us, and include no man who has ever harmed a woman or has political power to do so. Therefore MRAs mean women no harm, and Feminism wants to hurt men."

the greek philosopher

all women only want to have sex with alpha males even if they are awful fat omegas. This leaves all of us beta and omega men with no choice but to go after young teenage girls who will have sex with us because they're all dirty whores who haven't been trained by the matriarchy to only go after rich alphas like brad pitt

briget wrote:the greek philosopher

all women only want to have sex with alpha males even if they are awful fat omegas.

Omega women? No such thing. There may be alpha and beta women but not omega women. Men are the only disposable gender. Even the woman who wants to be the fattest woman in the world has a husband and has a website dedicated to her followers.

Buttman wrote:

briget wrote:the greek philosopher

all women only want to have sex with alpha males even if they are awful fat omegas.

Omega women? No such thing. There may be alpha and beta women but not omega women. Men are the only disposable gender. Even the woman who wants to be the fattest woman in the world has a husband and has a website dedicated to her followers.

I suggest you take this up with your fellow troll MRAL because he is the one who said that fat women are the omegas. You do realize that we don't actually believe these things right buttman? Hint to the trolls, this is the manboobz forum. We mock MRA misogyny. When we post stuff like this we are making fun of the things that you come into our space and tell us is the absolute truth about life everywhere and all interactions between men and women.

Buttman wrote:

briget wrote:the greek philosopher

all women only want to have sex with alpha males even if they are awful fat omegas.

Omega women? No such thing. There may be alpha and beta women but not omega women. Men are the only disposable gender. Even the woman who wants to be the fattest woman in the world has a husband and has a website dedicated to her followers.

... you know that all fat women don't have websites, right? And that feederism is a pretty rare fetish?

Actually, Buttman, if you feel like fat guys are being left out, you might want to Google "bears", "gainers" or "male feedees". Fat men posed sexily out to wazoo. Some of 'em even have Paypal links on their website! (NSFW link to one of my favorite male feedee's sites. The Paypal link is on the right once you scroll halfway down the page.)

Fat Women Are Too Ugly To Fuck, And Yet They Still Get Laid *More* Than Me!

I can't tell you how many times I've seen "Women are only valuable because of how they look!" and "The fact that even fatties get laid when I'm not is proof that we live in a Matriarchy!" in the same few sentences.

The Vizzini

"That is a fallacy! I've created the terms that make it a fallacy, and therefore, your argument is fallacious. My statements will therefore never be questioned under any form of empiricism because all forms of empiricism are fallacious except when done by my accepted variables"

The "Tomorrow the World" Declaration

"Sure women run everything now, but just you wait! Soon, very soon, feminism will cause the downfall of Civilization as We Know It and/or men will get fed up and rebel. By golly, THEN YOU'LL BE SORRY!"

The This Food Is Terrible, And Such Small Portions:
"Women are shallow, annoying, dim-witted, and vicious. I'm desperate to date one of them."

The I Meant Good Women:
"So what if every woman in this place tells me that my 'works on every woman' tactics wouldn't work on her? You're just not the right kind of woman."

The Damned If You Do, Damned If I Don't:
"Feminists approve of violence, which is a horrible, sick thing to do. So MRAs should have the right to approve of violence."

The Gender Denial Gotcha:
"Men are superior to women! Feminists aren't really women, they're so manly! ...hang on..."

The Half Ward Cleaver:
"The natural role of women is to stay home and keep the house while allowing a man to support them. The natural role of men is to run around spreading their seed indiscriminately and not getting trapped into supporting a woman."

The Don't I Wish:
"Feminists control the government and the media and write all the laws."

The Argumentum Ad Dworkin:
"Here's an offensive quote from a feminist. Unless you renounce feminism entirely, you agree with this quote."

(Psychic Powers Variation: "Here's an offensive quote from a feminist. No matter what you claim, I know you secretly agree with this quote.")

The Rape Definition Expert

"I have made a list of 5,000 criteria that must be met before I would consider that a woman was raped. If you find a female rape victim anywhere in the world that actually meets all 5,000 criteria, then she is still a lying liar".

Argumentum Solanas

"Men should never be held accountable for violent behavior because Valerie Solanas".

The Robotics Futurist

"You all will be sorry you when we replace you with robots! I can't wait to turn you down when you beg to have sex with me then!"

The I am a sociology class

"I have proof feminists are a bunch of meanies. I am a secret group of sociology students who agree you are mean and MRA's are nice. How can you deny what an entire class agrees upon?"

The Above it All

"MRA's say women are all evil, lying bitches. Women say they are people just like men. The fair thing to do is find a middle ground between these two positions."

The I Am Every Man

"Didn't you know that everything that has ever been of any use or importance to humanity was invented by a MAN? How dare women not throw themselves at me in gratitude? (Also, women suck for not inventing those things.)"

Pervocracy wrote:The Gish Gallop:
"Oh yeah, well, what about Title IX? And VAWA? And false accusations? And the Pussy Pass? And the wage gap myth? And affirmative action? And WIC? And this Andrea Dworkin quote? And that rash I've had on my right buttcheek lately?"

I misread "WIC" as "WTC" and thought "are Truthers joining up with MRAs now?"

The Ion
"You people have no lives! I will now devote hours of my life to telling you this in great detail."

Ion, who never did admit he was Johnny_B, despite the fact that both accounts used the same IP address IN HUNGARY, continues to stop by once in a while to make little snarky comments about us all, even though he knows I'm not going to publish them.

David Futrelle wrote:

The Ion
"You people have no lives! I will now devote hours of my life to telling you this in great detail."

Ion, who never did admit he was Johnny_B, despite the fact that both accounts used the same IP address IN HUNGARY, continues to stop by once in a while to make little snarky comments about us all, even though he knows I'm not going to publish them.

Hahahahaha, really? Wow.